677 + 573 Weeks

It's Thursday again and I feel like falling asleep in my chair!  This week has taken it out of me, and I'm not even sure why.  Jeff says he's feeling the same.  I've been really busy creating a token reward system and family rules and expectations, according to everything set out by Arley's behaviour specialist.  We are rolling this system out on Wednesday of next week, the day after the kids' birthday.  They both know about it, and Arley is well and truly freaking out - Carmie not so much.  I have had to set up the Microsoft Family Safety app so that I can control the kids' computers and their time spent on them.  This has required them both having Microsoft accounts, which they have, but somehow I set Arley's computer up using my own Microsoft account.  The battle has been logging my account off his computer and logging in using his account.  You'd think this would be relatively easy, but no.  I've been trying for three weeks now.  The first two weeks were very stressful and full of fights, then I was able to switch the accounts.  However, before I had a chance to change my password, Arley had switched back.  I have continued to try to switch accounts again.  Mum came over on Monday and also tried.  Arley ended up telling her that he switched accounts and we were relieved...until I discovered that he lied and hadn't.  Then last night I was done.  We had a massive blowup and we got him from his room and I was able to switch accounts, log out of mine, and also change the password.  I was SO relieved.  I checked Family Safety today, and it shows no activity on his account.  Arley switched back, figured out my password clue, got my password correct and logged himself back in!  Aaarrrgggghhhhh!  So, he's back on my account.  At lunch we tried to have a civil discussion about it.  He says that if he goes onto his own account he is logged out of everything and it's too stressful to log back in, trying to remember his passwords, and he has 'memories' on my account.  As it stands now, he can stay on my account, but as soon as he does not get off the computer when asked, I am removing him from my account forever and changing my password to a brand new baffling password that he will never guess!  This afternoon he has gotten off every time I have asked...if only he had been doing this all along, we wouldn't be in the position we are in now!

Arley finally learned to ride his bike properly!  He isn't scared anymore and has been out every day on it.  I must admit to a little unicycle riding to keep him company - nothing dangerous, I don't want any more injuries!  We have been riding around the block in our neighbourhood, and he really likes it!

Carmie has been doing fine this week.  We have come to the conclusion that Carmie  hates confrontation of any sort, and that is why she always says yes to everything we ask, but then she just does her own thing, which generally means she doesn't do what we ask and we find out hours or days later.  This parenting business is tough!  She is also officially taller than me now, which is frightening!

I'm lacking in photos again this week, but don't worry, the kids look much the same as they did the week before.  Ha ha.

676 + 572 Weeks

So, I'm a day late and a dollar short.  Well, not really a dollar short, but it feels that way.  I had severe insomnia last night, just like the good old days.  Yesterday morning I had to get a steroid injection into my hip because I have bursitis there that will not go away.  The injection hurt like hell and I was limping for the rest of the day.  I didn't realise that the steroid would also give me insomnia, so I didn't fall asleep until the very early hours of the morning, despite all my sleep aids which just made my brain ache!  So, I haven't been in the best of forms today.  I was reduced to tears when Arley refused to get his leftover pizza from the fridge because now he doesn't like touching plastic.  Insert massive eye roll.  We had a dispute over it.  Thankfully Jeff was around to calm us both down, and eventually Arley was able to get his pizza from the fridge.  I wasn't asking him to heat it up or anything, just bring it over to me so I could heat it.  When his demand avoidance is so strong that he can't do simple tasks and it feels like he is taking the piss, I just can't handle it.  I was really upset.  This parenting job is really tough!

We have had a good week though.  On Friday for our family time, Jeff was busy, so I took the kids out to a cafe...well, I tried to.  Everything was closed because of a semi-public holiday, and we ended up at McDonalds of all places.  However, this turned out to be great.  As much as I hate the place, every McDonalds smells the same, their food tastes the same, it's never too loud, and all very familiar, so the kids had no anxiety at all, and we ended up having some fun conversations!  McDonalds might become our regular haunt for the time being, until we can go other places without stress.  I just wish it wasn't McDonalds!!

We even got to see our friends this week, which doesn't happen often.  We met up with my friend Nicky and her kids Lexi and Felix, and baby Evie, down at Mooloolaba.  We got the kids ice cream and then hung out near the beach.  Our trips always have to involve some food treat of some sort, but I'll take it!

Carmie is doing well enough - flying under the radar.  She is turning in to your typical teenager; saying yes when she really means no (when we ask her to do something), sleeping late (we've had to move her wakeup time to 9am on advice from her behaviour specialist), and spending hours in her room.  She loved her D&D sessions this week and she's had a good week overall.

Arley has spent a lot of time on screens, as usual, but he has also had some big wins this week.  He went to Clint's session at Chambers Island on Wednesday, and actually participated as promised.  He had a really good time and got some exercise in.  When he got home he was too tired to go to his social session with Sprinkle, so I called the morning a win and let him stay home.  But then after lunch he came off his computer to play a game with me, and then he asked to try to ride his bike again (he has been so scared of this!).  He got on his bike and rode around, with me only holding on to him for a few minutes.  He got it, and is actually riding now! Albeit only in one direction around the cul de sac, but we are working on it!  I had to end bike riding early because I had to drive Carmie down to one of her social groups, and he actually asked to join in, so I took him down too.  Such a big day for him!  And then yesterday I tried a new food with him (I haven't really mentioned Arley's eating struggles too much, but it's pretty dire), and he loved it.  I made him what is apparently the best pizza he has ever had!  And he had it for lunch again today (remember the tears from before?).  This is huge, because now I have another meal to feed him, which makes life easier.  I have four dinners to choose from now, five if Jeff has made hummus.  Win!

Anyway, I am exhausted and really looking forward to relaxing a bit this weekend.

At McDonalds, our new found chill eatery :(

Out with Lexi

Carmie and her team award

Arley and the best pizza ever

675 + 571 Weeks

I don't have too much to say. It has been just another week, no major dramas.  Jeff and I went to dinner and a classical music concert on Saturday while Lolo & Dida looked after the kids.  It was good to have a night out.  It wasn't even a late night, which I think made it even better - haha.  We have well and truly lost the urge for late nights out, which is the exact opposite of how we were when we met.

The kids are doing well.  Carmie is out to dinner right now with her 'workmates' from her social groups.  Carmie is being paid to do a weekly animation for their social media platforms.  She is very proud of having her first job, and she is very good at saving, so she is amassing a small fortune.  There are a few other teens who 'work' there too, and the company won an award, so they are all out at dinner celebrating.  She's so grown up!

Meanwhile Arley is in the kitchen eating a bowl of ramen noodles with no idea that Carmie isn't even home.  Ha ha.

Last night I went to my life drawing session.  I am going weekly now, and I am loving it.  It isn't relaxing but it is entirely my thing, and it feels good to focus so completely on something else.  I have a lot of room for improvement too, which is a little mortifying but at least I have goals now!

Arley refused to go to Clint again on Wednesday.  I am at my wits end.  When he refused, I made a deal with him that instead of going to Clint, he has to exercise every day instead.  He agreed, so I thought it was a win.  Of course, when it was time to exercise he refused and said he will start going to Clint again as of next week.  Insert massive eye roll.  We shall see when Wednesday rolls around.  He knows just how to do my head in.

The kids both got their hair cut on Friday of last week, but once again I don't have a single photo.  I will do better next week!

674 + 570 Weeks

Arley and I have both been a little sick this week.  He's had a bad cough and a runny nose, and I've had the remaining cold symptoms of headache, sore throat and swollen glands.  We make a pretty good team.  I'm not 100% yet, but I'll be right by the weekend.  I still went to my life drawing session this week - it is my new favourite activity.  It's not fun exactly, as it is like work, but it is very satisfying to do, and totally removes my brain from thinking about family life or the business.  And I have so much room for improvement it's almost embarrassing!

We haven't done too much beyond our normal activities.  Last Friday for our family time we went to a cafe for breakfast/morning tea.  It was actually kind of stressful, because Arley wasn't in the best frame of mind.  It is hard to find places that we can all eat at but that are also quiet and empty enough for the kids.  Both have pretty strong sensory problems with noise and crowded places, so it can be hit or miss.  We shall persist though.

On Monday the kids had OT but Carmie's OT was sick, so Arley's came alone.  I should have known this would cause problems.  Arley's OT assistant is a guy called Jordan, and Arley really likes him, but trying to get him to do something that Carmie doesn't have to is near impossible!  Ugh, trying to get Arley out of his room, let alone out of his bed, was SO hard.  I tell you, he is the most strong-willed boy on the planet!  He also refused to participate with Clint on Wednesday morning.  He chose to just sit there on his iPad at Chambers Island instead.  It's tough.  

Today we paid an IT guy to come to our house and set all the computers and iPads up so that I can control them.  We are not going to be using this new-found power of mine until we meet with the behaviour specialist again, but now I will finally have a bargaining tool to use with the kids.  I think all hell is going to break loose, at least at first, but we have to try.

Carmie is doing well.  She has three D&D groups each week, and now she is on the waitlist to join an online D&D group for autistic kids.  She could not be happier than when she is playing D&D.  It is the perfect game for Carmie - she has such a great imagination and she loves story-telling, and it is easy for her to socialise within the structure of the game.  It is so great to see her have something she looks forward to going to three times a week.

I don't have many photos again - the ones I do have I just took right now.  Carmie gave me a nice photo, but Arley made a face in every one. Here are the best shots that I got.  At least you can see how great his teeth are looking now!  He still has another 15 weeks of Invisalign treatment.  I can't wait until he is finished.