325 + 221 Weeks

Well, my 43rd birthday came and went this week.  I have to say, it was not the best birthday I have ever had.  The weekend was nice - my sister came down with her husband and my nephews, so we had a birthday lunch at my parent's house.  Arley was a bit overwhelmed, and immediately climbed underneath the coffee table, so we got him playing my phone with his little headphones on, and he was all good after that.  Afterwards I even got in an afternoon nap, so Sunday was good.  Then on Monday, my birthday, I had organised a play at Narrawallee for the kids and their friends.  One of my friends brought a cake, which was sweet.  We had a kayak and a canoe, and Carmie and Arley and Ness had me canoeing them up and down the inlet for ages.  Arley just loves sitting in a boat on the water!  Carmie tried kayaking for the first time, but she got a little scared when the current started taking her away, and then she got beached and had to get rescued.  It was a lovely morning.  Arley wasn't terribly social, and he still wouldn't take his sandals off.  When we got home, he was really out of sorts.  And that's when my birthday went south.  He had several meltdowns over the course of the afternoon.  I am practising being nonreactive to him, which can be very difficult when I just want to throttle him!  In saying that, it is easier when I remember that none of this is his fault, and he gets calmer faster when I remain calm.  I guess now is a good time to mention that Arley has been diagnosed with autism and ADHD, however just yesterday his paediatrician told me he wants to hold off on the ADHD diagnosis for the moment because he is hoping this changes as Arley ages.  It has been a rough few weeks going through this assessment and diagnosis, but we are already underway with the therapies we are supposed to be doing, and I just have to keep reminding myself that nothing has changed, we just have more knowledge now.  But it really does explain SO much.  His occupational therapist has noticed that his tactile defensiveness has gotten worse, and she said this could be causing a lot of his anxiety and aggression, so she has us brushing him again.  This means we have a special brush, and we have to brush his little body a certain way, every two hours (while he is awake), for the next two weeks.  It is pretty hard core!  We can't skip a session or be late for a brushing, because it can make his nervous system worse than it was before we started.  So fingers crossed we get through this!  He doesn't particularly like it either, so I have made him a sticker chart, and at the end of two weeks, he gets a new train to add to his collection.  One good thing to mention is that his assessor said he has very advanced verbal skills, and all of his therapists have let me know he is crazy smart.  His assessor told me never to argue with him because he will always win, he is that smart and that stubborn.

Anyway, Carmie is doing well.  She is pretty understanding of everything that is going on.  I have bought her a bunch of 'my sibling has autism' books, and they are arriving next week.  This is the best way for her to learn as she is such a bookworm.  She is missing her homeschool buddies - everyone has taken off on holidays.  But we have seen her schooled friend Ness, with more schoolie playdates scheduled for next week, so that makes up for it.

This week the kids and I also had lunch in town with Aunty Georgia, and she took them to the bakery for treats.  And then today, Jeffrey got them to the park while I was at the gallery.  Other than that, we were homebodies :)

On that note, I'll just say that I am fairly shattered.  I haven't been sleeping well, and I have a whole lot of painting to do for my November show.  I'll be done in three weeks (whether I like it or not, I will have just run out of time!), and then I'll cut myself some slack and maybe even get a massage :)

Here are some videos of Arley.  I realised that I have so many more videos of Carmie growing up, I felt guilty and quickly shot these :)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ya3qExMsJPQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q99MD1Ws-pQ

At Narrawallee Inlet on my birthday

 Arley and his true love Ness

 At the bakery

Park play with Dad

324 + 220 Weeks

We have tried to take it easy this week and not do too much.  I think we are all kind of overwhelmed at the moment.  I got a break on Sunday as I had to go to the gallery, which equals five hours of (interrupted) computer time, which was just so needed!  We have so much going on as far as Arley is concerned.  Almost two weeks ago, we took all of the bad additives and preservatives out of his diet, and today we went to a naturopath/nutritionalist.  This turned out to be one of the most stressful hour and a half periods of time in history, as I had both kids with me and I forgot their iPads.  Two kids, me and a doctor, in a small room for an hour and a half.  OMG.  Anyway, she is testing him for a variety of things from heavy metals to mineral deficiencies, and she is also recommending a gluten and dairy free diet - how on earth we would manage that I don't know.  All he eats is crackers, fruit, cheese and yoghurt.  I can't even wrap my head around that one.

We met our homeschool buddies at the north end of Mollymook beach on Monday, for a quick albeit windy play.  On Tuesday the kids and I went shopping for their Dida's birthday present, and then we ended up at the beach hut for lunch and then a play and rock climb at the south end of Mollymook Beach.  We are not looking forward to school holidays next week when the crowds come - so nice having all that beach space to ourselves.  On Tuesday it was Dida's birthday, so we went over for dinner and then the kids were invited to stay for a sleep over.  Arley was on the fence at first, then he was decidedly for a sleep over, but then when it came time for me to leave, he lost the plot and couldn't cope, so he came home with us again. The next morning though he didn't even want to eat breakfast with me - he made me rush him straight back to his Lolo and Dida's for the day.  Of course I had a million things to do that day so I didn't even get to enjoy my free time!  Today I took the kids to the movies, just for something different.  We were the only ones in the cinema, which was really lucky, because Carmie couldn't sit still in her seat and Arley asked very loud questions every two minutes.  But they enjoyed themselves and I got to sit down for a bit!

The school holidays start next week, which means we have to deal with extra people.  ArtFest is happening around town, but I think we are going to stay pretty low key over the next few weeks.  Our house looks like a tornado hit it, and I have so much painting to do!!  Little Carmie is sitting here right next to me playing Minecraft, so I'd best be off and get her skinny butt to bed :)

I love walking into the lounge room to find this scene:

 Homies at Mollymook Beach

 Happy 71th Bithday!  So cute!

 Smelzer

323 + 219 Weeks

This week has been full of ups and downs.  Arley had a brilliant weekend - he was happy and smiling and kind and calm, and life was good!  Talk about taking the stress off!  On Saturday we went to the holiday park at Lake Conjola, so the kids could have a jump on the bouncy pillow and a play at the park.  This burns up their energy like crazy and is really good for Arley.  After their play, we went and had hot chips followed by ice cream for lunch at the lake (yes, nothing like feeding the kids a healthy diet of hot chips and ice cream!).  It was such a beautiful day, and so peaceful there!

Sunday was a quiet one at home, with lots of playing games and so much peace from Arley, we couldn't believe our luck!  And then came Monday, and he truly woke up on the wrong side of the bed.  Oh my goodness.  He just grizzled all day long.  And it was such a beautiful warm day too!  Jeffrey and I took the kids and the dog to the beach for a picnic, and this turned into an impromptu meet up with our homeschool friends.  Carmie got to hang our with her pal Winny, who she adores.   The kids climbed on the rocks and played at the beach, and still Arley grizzled!  We just couldn't make him happy.  His OT said it's because he held it together for two whole days, and then it was like the floodgates opened.  Anyway, we survived.

On Tuesday Arley and I went to the library, where they were having a giant booksale, and we made out like bandits!  Carmie couldn't believe her luck when we got home - she has at least 40 new books to read (it's two days later, and she's done with four of them already).  She has started telling me all about the books and the characters and plots, but she never tells me the endings so she doesn't ruin the story for when I read them! :)

On Wednesday we went up to Nowra for Arley's therapy.  His OT says she sees a huge difference in his sharing and turn-taking ability, and I'd have to say I think she is right.  Small mercies!  And today Arley woke up grumpy again, so after breakfast I took the kids to the neighbourhood park for some exercise.  We ran around the park (believe it or not, I had the most stamina!!), and then we played catch, and kick ball too.  This did help to settle Arley a little so that he was more manageable for the rest of the day - he only exploded seven or eight times instead of fifteen!  Poor little guy.  He is such a sweet guy when he is calm, and really funny too.  My little man.

Anyway, we've had a lot of stuff going and it's been a really emotional week.  Here's to next week being better.

 Lunch at the lake

 At Collers beach, the most beautiful spring day

 He likes to play with his cars in the rock pools :)

 Climbing with friends

322 + 218 Weeks

We celebrated Father's Day this past Sunday, and while I couldn't exactly give Jeff the total relaxation he deserved, he says he had a nice day.  We spent the morning at home while Arley played with Gemma, and we spent the afternoon at the Golfy with Lolo and Dida.  Sadly Jeffrey still had to do all of the cooking, as my time is totally dominated by Arley these days, with a sprinkle of Carmie in there for good measure.

On Saturday and Monday mornings the kids went to their friends' house so I could get some painting done.  My good friend and fellow homeschooler Tanya has been most obliging in taking the kids off my hands, as I have a show coming up in November and a super tight deadline (even though I've known about the show for months - time just crept up on me!).  The kids had so much fun over there, and it is so nice to see how another home educator does things, and all the imaginative cool things these kids get up to together.  Little Arley has separation anxiety from me though, so now he says that I have to stay whenever we go to friends' houses (which doesn't exactly free up my time to paint!).

On Tuesday we had a play at my friend Deb's house, with her kids Winter and Yenje, and Tanya and her crew too.  Carmie got to play Minecraft and Arley got to play trains, so that made for two happy kids.  And us mums got to hang out and chat, which is always a bonus.  On Wednesday I took Arley to get his hair cut.  We have been growing it out for the winter because he refuses to wear a beanie.  So, I finally took him to get a proper hair cut.  He was not happy, and it took a good 15 minutes to get him into the chair.  Luckily we were the only ones in the salon.  In the end he ended up sitting on my lap, getting us both all hairy.  His hair cut is really cute when there is hair product in it, but of course he won't let me put any in :(  Anyway, after this we went as a family to see another therapist for you know who, and while it was emotionally draining, I feel like we are one step closer to getting help.

Today we had a home day, which was needed.  Little Arley taught himself how to play Minecraft, and I gave Carmie a drawing lesson.  Then the kids' friend Loki came over for a play, which was nice because he and Arley get along really well, and I get a little respite.  Only a little though, because Arley was having a doozy of a day today.  I'm not sure what set him off, but he was out of sorts all day.  We took the kids to the park and they got a run around, and Arley was a little better afterwards, so maybe he just needed to get his body moving.  He is very difficult to handle when he is like this, so I hope we get this all figured out soon.

And Carmie...she is getting so tall these days, and looks very much like a six year old.  She is totally impulsive, and you never saw a messier girl in your whole life, but she is still sweet and sensitive and so patient with Arley.  She is a good role model for him, so hopefully a little bit rubs off here and there :)

Arley and Gemma watering the neighbour's garden

 At their friends' house

 Dancing to Dora Dance on the Xbox

 Carmie and Winny, Minecrafting

 Arley, post hair cut

 The kids and their buddy Loki