728, 729 + 624, 625 Weeks

So, Jeffrey left for the US nine days ago.  He will be back on July 1st, so we still have quite a ways to go.  The day he left I got really sad, had a bit of a cry, told the kids we were having the day off, and I spent the whole afternoon binge-watching my current tv show.  I have not done that in years.  Years and years!  The next day I got up full of energy, so I think it was exactly what I needed.  It has been rather peaceful around here.  I'd have to say, day to day parenting has been easier as a solo parent - but, life is not nearly as much fun.  The kids have only me telling them what to do, which I think they quite like.  Haha.  I've been doing Jeff's chores like dog poop clean up, and taking out the rubbish, and I've taken to not cooking myself dinner, because why even bother? LOL.  I feed the kids separately.  I've been painting more too, trying to fill up my time.  But it's hard at night time, with no one to chat with and laugh with, and going to bed is rather a sad event.  I am looking forward to Jeffrey's return.  I just hope the kids stay this cooperative!

Before Jeff left, we took the kids to the mall one day to ride the paddle boats and get some food.  It was fun but stressful, a good reminder of why we should get out more with them, but also a reminder of why we don't!  Ha ha.

Life has been going on as usual.  The kids have a new reward system where they are earning stars each day, and they can cash them in for different things.  They got me on Saturday by both cashing in stars to go to McDonalds for dinner.  While I was cringing because they were eating such gross food for dinner, it was also nice to be out, and we had fun.  Carmie has been feeling just ok - some good days and some bad.  She has made it to most of her groups, as well as physio, and also managed to go rock climbing with Clint again this week.  I had to get her blood drawn again last week, in lieu of her appointment with her gastroenterologist next week.  Hopefully they can figure out why she is always nauseous.  Arley has had his friends over a couple of times.  Not Luca, because they have had a falling out (it involved Luca being aggressive, Arley punching him -!!- and Luca smashing Arley's phone, shattering his screen.  By the way, Luca is about a foot taller than Arley, and almost double his weight). Luca is currently not welcome in our house!  Other than that, Arley has been doing well.  He had his first psychology session with his new psychologist, a man named Jason.  I have been searching for a male psych for Arley for years, so I am very happy to have found one, and even better, Arley likes him.  They had a good session on Tuesday, and Arley will be seeing him fortnightly from now on.

I don't have much else to add.  I'm only posting every two weeks these days, because not much changes around here anymore!

Arley in heaven, at McDonalds, sitting alone with his iPad and headphones :)

726, 727 + 622, 623 Weeks

Well, it has been a full-on couple of weeks, with some big wins, and a totally crap day yesterday that took the cake of crap days.  But, the wins have been good, starting with Arley going off to a birthday party on his own, when he only knew the kid whose birthday it was.  The boy is called Bronson, and he is a friend of Luca, the boy down the road.  Luca introduced them, and now Arley and Bronson play together online, and have hung out a couple of times with Luca.  Jeff and I took Arley to the party and then went to a nearby cafe for brunch so we could be close by if Arley needed us.  The party was two hours long, and Arley lasted an hour and forty-five minutes before he messaged me to pick him up.  When we got there, I found Arley sitting among the kids and parents, strumming a toy guitar and yacking it up with the best of them.  He fit right in, even though it was a pool party and we didn't know.  Arley had swum in his shorts and socks, and had a blast.  I'm sure the other kids didn't even know he is homeschooled, let alone autistic.  It was such a pleasant surprise to see him right in the mix, socialising with the best of them!

Last weekend Arley found out that Bronson was just down the road at Luca's house, and he asked if they could come over.  So Bronson and Luca came over, with another neighbourhood kid, a girl called Piper who goes to highschool with Luca.  They stayed and played with Arley for ages, then Arley went off to Luca's house for an hour or so, before Bronson and Piper came back to ours, without Luca.  Then Bronson was picked up, but Piper stayed for another hour playing alone with Arley.  Since then, Luca and Piper have been over two more times, and then yesterday they all wanted to hang out here again, but I said no, not after the day I had had.  So, unbelievably, Arley went and hung out with them at the park for an hour.  You have no idea how huge that is.  Arley hates going outside, hates the park, and hates not having an actual activity to do (like play Xbox).  I couldn't believe it.  Huge win!

I have finally found a male psychologist for Arley, and had my first meeting with him on Tuesday.  After chatting for almost an hour, the pscyh told me that Arley has many layers to him that we have to delve into, but that his newfound social life is the key to everything - it will help him mature faster than anything, help him learn social norms, learn about the opposite sex, learn self-confidence, and boost his self esteem.  We have to foster these friendships as much as possible.  And Arley is going to start seeing this psychologist fortnightly, and I couldn't be happier about it.

Carmie had a big win too.  Clint took the kids rock climbing at an indoor gym, and Carmie got her climbing mojo back!  She used to love rock climbing and bouldering, but 18 months ago she had a huge panic attack when I took her, and she hadn't gone back since.  Clint said she smashed it, and she enjoyed it so much that she is going to go weekly (fortnightly with Clint, and then with Jeffrey every other week).  Clint took her bouldering this week too.  It's going to be the best thing for her back, and I'm so glad we found something that will help and that she loves!  She has also been doing her phsyio twice a week with her physio support worker, but she missed her actual physio session yesterday, as well as D&D, due to severe nausea.

Carmie's physio is also a nutritionist and women's health specialist, and she has been trying to help with Carmie's nausea and feeling faint.  After keeping a food/health diary, we have come to the conclusion that Carmie has dizziness and nausea due to low blood pressure.  This gives us something to work with, so I'm hoping we can make some easy changes to Carmie's eating and drinking patterns that will help.

So, yesterday was a day from hell.  Arley woke up on fire, so dysregulated and angry.  He was really causing us so much stress, including himself.  I warned our support worker who took the kids to see Clint at Chambers Island, and I also warned Clint.  When the kids were getting out of the car, Arley put his hands on Carmie's shoulders, and she turned her head and shrugged to get his hands off her - he thought she bit him (that's him in fight mode due to dysregulation), and he hit her in the head (ear) from behind.  This set off a string of phone calls between the kids and I, and I felt completely helpless.  No one can help Arley with regulation like I can, and it was very stressful to have both kids melting down (Carmie even bolted and ran away - she was safe, but still!) and not being there to help.  Clint ended up driving Carmie home, and our support worker took Arley to Caloundra for his time with Sprinkle and his buddy Liam.  Carmie was a mess when she got home, we couldn't go to physio, then the education department called and said they couldn't register us for next year for homeschooling as my education plans for the next year don't show enough change.  The woman was questioning our homeschooling methods, and I broke down and cried to her for half an hour!  OMG.  Turns out she is a teacher, and after hearing how hard I have it, she passed our registration (yay!) and has put the kids into a different homeschool program for diverse learners, so going forward it will be much easier.  So, that is a win!  But then it was time for D&D, so I drove Carmie there, only for her to tell me she was too nauseous to get out of the car, and could we just go home.  The day at least ended on a good note, with Arley going off to the park to play, and I got some peace and quiet for a cup of tea and a rest.

Jeffrey is leaving for his trip to the US on Tuesday of next week.  He will be gone for three weeks, and I am NOT looking forward to it!!

This is a photo of Arley rock climbing, proof that he made it to the top!

Here's Carmie at the top

At our Saturday brunch